Today I was having a conversation with a few friends and I
came to realize that not only did I notice that it revolved around different
topics of divorce, including the recent Kim Kardashian divorce and my friend’s
parents’ recent divorce, but I was the only one of us whose parents are not
divorced. It sort of hit me that divorce is pretty much a given in many
marriages lately. So I decided to look into the facts…
I
went to the National Census Bureau online, which led me to a website that gave
some pretty shocking statistics. The marriage rate per 1000 people is 6.8, and
the divorce rate per 1000 people is 3.4. That means that a staggering 50% of
marriages in the United States end in divorce.
Just absorbing that fact made me
realize how much hurt our nation must be going through on a daily basis. My
best friend’s parents are going through an ugly divorce right now, and it hurts
me to see her like this. I know that a lot of people are going through the same
struggle. With statistics like these, it’s easy to assume that most everyone in
America is either getting a divorce, has already gotten a divorce, or is
connected in someway to someone who is getting or has gotten a divorce.
What I really want to know is why
so many people are getting divorces these days. Could it be like in Kim Kardashian’s
case where she didn’t quite think things through, and wasn’t ready to be married?
Or could it be that our human nature is to not stay with one period for a long
period of time? I don’t really know what the answer is, but what I do know is that
this has to stop because it is affecting too many of us today.
I've noticed recently too that divorce has become extremely common in this day and age. A good majority of my friend's parents are already divorced or starting to get one. I think that the increase in divorce has been because of two reasons.
ReplyDeleteThe first is simply because of the economy and the hard times we live in. People are under a lot more stress these days and it can put tension and strain on any relationship.
The second reason is because women have become more powerful. It used to be unthinkable that a woman would ever leave her husband. A woman wouldn't be able to get a job or support herself without a man. You were expected to stay loyal to your husband no matter what. Nowadays women have more power and do not need a man in order to succeed.
My parents got divorced when I was pretty young; it was before I was in kindergarten. When I was in elementary school, I always felt like I was singled out, and like I was the only kid in the school who's parent weren't together anymore. Of course that wasn't true, but there still very very many cases of divorce, maybe 5 tops? The sad fact is that as I got older, it became more and more common. I no longer felt like I stuck out. As I entered high school, it was almost like the minority had switched, and I am now a part of the mass of students who's parents aren't together.
ReplyDeleteThere are a lot of things that factor into divorce. Sometimes a couple gets married too young. My parents got married in their early thirties, and are still together today. My mom made it very clear that she wasn't going to get married just because she could. She never thought of it as "something to try"- it's a commitment.
ReplyDeleteAnother fact to consider is that although there was a much lower divorces rate 50 years ago, that doesn't mean people weren't unhappy. It just means they didn't get divorced.
Americans are past the point of settling. We get what what want, and if that means getting divorced three times until we're happy, so be it! (A strategy I wouldn't suggest, but it happens more often then we think)
I would argue that the reason for such a spike in divorce rates is that it has become much easier and respectable to get a divorce. Courts have made it increasingly easier to get a divorce and because of that, divorce has become more acceptable. Making it so easy to split up creates the attitude that a couple can give marriage a try and see how it works, because if it doesn't work out it is easy to split up and go separate ways.
ReplyDeleteAlso, when couples go through tough times, which every couple should, making it so easy to split up takes away the motivation to actually work it out. Couples figure, divorce is so easy and convenient so why work it out when couples can just split up?
I think this isa major problem especially when couples have had children together because it completely ruptures a child's sense of order and home. Marriage should not be taken so lightly. Couples get married today because thats just what people do, not necessarily because they want to spent the rest of their lives together.